33 Comments
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Victoria's avatar

There is so much love and growth and beauty here - that I could also feel the grief-rage, bereft space of the tree. "But it was never really about the tree. Is it ever?"...Then that paragraph starting "The moment Brady and I made eye contact as he was leaving this earth, ..." these words "...it is faithfully walking someone home for as long as you are given, and then freely opening your hands when it is time to let go."

Thank you for sharing Brady and your family with us.

Effectively Jettisoned's avatar

Thank you, Victoria! So happy to have found you on Substack. ❤️

Victoria's avatar

Thank you. I'm glad I found yours - your pieces have lingered in my mind - the Butterbear and manatees", "The Bike"

I may not be able to read each one when you publish, but I'll always return! xo

G and T: The Journey's avatar

That was so beautifully written. I feel your pain and hope at the same time. So many wonderful memories to treasure. And like you say, he was ready to be free, to be with you in spirit until the time comes for you to meet again. Sending much love ❤️

Effectively Jettisoned's avatar

Thank you G! I love reading about your adventures. We are headed to Paris in 3 weeks!

G and T: The Journey's avatar

Oh wow! How wonderful. Have a lovely time x

Priyanka Bali's avatar

Thank you for sharing this with us. Our journeys are different, but I have felt acute loss, I’m grieving the loss of my baby boy.

Reading about your life snippets with Brady helped me, gave me some kind of lightness in my heart. Yet my heart is heavy for everything that could

have been. Thank you again.

Effectively Jettisoned's avatar

Priyanka, I am so sorry you lost your precious baby boy. ❤️

Chris B. Writes's avatar

Two years ago, we nearly lost our son Bray Bray. I am so so sorry for your loss. I also appreciate the way you are honoring Brady by keeping that hope and joy for life, as excruciatingly hard as it is. God bless you and your family.

Effectively Jettisoned's avatar

I’m so sorry you had such a scare with your son. I absolutely love reading about Bray Bray and your deep love for him! Such incredible gifts to have been given kids like our amazing sons.

Marilyn Graham Werden's avatar

Oh how calming in my depths. Just what I needed to read tonight. Thank you, bless you, and bless Brady too.

Effectively Jettisoned's avatar

Thank you, Marilyn! ❤️

Jennifer Margulis's avatar

Thank you for this beautiful essay. It’s so full of love. And sadness.

Effectively Jettisoned's avatar

It is a weird and delicate balance, isn’t it? I think about you so often Jennifer. ❤️

Judi Bailey, M.Ed's avatar

Your story was very moving. Our experiences are quite different, but I have felt deep loss. I felt your feelings as I read on. I wish many blessings to you and your family,

Effectively Jettisoned's avatar

Thank you Judi. I am thankful I found you and am reading through your substack!

Judi Bailey, M.Ed's avatar

I appreciate your response.

Kelly - Mothers never give up's avatar

This is such a heartbreakingly beautiful piece. The words resonate with me so very deeply. I knew too well what it felt like before and after the death of your child, as well as as the devastation of watching"your world shrink" while there is nothing you can do... I feel your pain, and appreciate you sharing this with such raw honesty and grace.

Sending you hugs and much love, from one bereaved mother to another...

Effectively Jettisoned's avatar

Thank you. I love reading about Kevin. Your stories always resonate here so deeply too.

Marjorie Pezzoli's avatar

“unless you have loved someone deeply enough to understand that love is not possession. It is stewardship, it is presence, it is faithfully walking someone home for as long as you are given, and then freely opening your hands when it is time to let go.”

Beautifully stated, time is such a gift, we know this now. 🎁❤️✨

Effectively Jettisoned's avatar

Thank you Marjorie. I love your cosmic gumball machine! Time is indeed such a gift. ❤️

Marjorie Pezzoli's avatar

🙏☺️💫✨💫🟣🟠🟡🔵🟢🔴💫✨

Susan Fusco-Fazio's avatar

I am deeply moved (tears and more tears) by your beautiful and devastating story of love and tender moments spent with your precious son in the backyard, and how you are continuing to try to find Hope by enjoying the little things that grow there. Your story personally resonates with me ( my daughter had longterm illness from birth-to passing at almost 15 years old).

I re-stacked your post on my Substack with a quote & note.

Keep planting and hoping and looking for that joy that you shared with Brady. when I look at his photo, I can feel the joy and resilience in his beautiful smile -emanating out at me.

Effectively Jettisoned's avatar

Thank you Susan. I have loved reading about Laura and your long journey with her. So many similar thoughts and hopes and dreams. ❤️

Sara Clime's avatar

Beautiful writing. Thank you so much for sharing that with us. Hugs.

Effectively Jettisoned's avatar

Sara, reading thank you for reading about Brady! I am just discovering your beautiful Substack. What a gift! I am looking so forward to reading more from you.

Sara Clime's avatar

Same! Thank you.

Nancy E. Holroyd, RN's avatar

I wept my way through the parallels of creating an oasis and grieving a loss. Your great love and joy is still there amongst the grief.

Effectively Jettisoned's avatar

I know you understand, in every possible way!

Esther Stanway-Williams's avatar

Your words feel like a sacred outpouring of love for Brady. Your gorgeous boy. Your profound loss.

Restacking ❤️❤️❤️

Effectively Jettisoned's avatar

Thank you Esther. I am so thankful for you and all of the parents you have connected me to who help me navigate this winding path!

Beth Schnyders's avatar

So many beautiful images and reminders. Thank you again for so visibly sharing all the heartaches yet showing us how to walk such a painful road with hope and joy.

May I use some of this post? I have the privilege of leading a group devotion at a women's event, and I'd love to share some of your words....

Come, Lord Jesus!